surprised? or just aware?

it takes alot of control to look at something, and desire it. but leave it.

I have some of the delicious spread here today. for my mid afternoon snack.

and its still here. i have opened the container 3 times to smell it. but haven't had it yet,  I haven't eaten my alloted afternoon snack. yay me.

and I dont know if I am surprised at myself regarding the amount of self control i have, or more aware, knowing i've always had it, but chose to blatantly ignore it sometimes.